Women's Circle

Hi Mom,

It's Jennifer, again. I went to a women's circle last night. This was the first time I've ever been to a women's circle. We all got to speak about ourselves and I talked about how sad I am that you're not here.

I'm sad that we didn't really know each other and couldn't be friends. I wanted to talk to you Mom, but I don't think you really understood me. Maybe you thought I was a weak person, not fierce like you. I think it takes a strong person to be vulnerable in front of other people, and I can do that, Mom. I cried in front of a group of women I didn't know, and we all held hands and supported each other. I don't think you could have done that, Mom. I'm stronger than you think.

I wish you were at the women's circle with me, Mom. I guess you were there, in spirit. The leader said your name when we joined hands, to honor you. I hope you were listening. Just know that I want to be your friend.

Love,

Jennifer

Letter to my Dead Mother

Dear Mom,

I'm making cranberry sauce today. It's Sunday morning, and I also made pumpkin muffins with Dylan. It's November, it's getting close to Thanksgiving. Remember, we used to make cranberry sauce together? I loved sipping the hot, sweet cranberries, mixed with water and sugar, as it was cooking. I tasted the hot cranberry juice today, and I was thinking about you. I'm going to make pumpkin pie this year with Dylan. I've never made pumpkin pie before. I hope it comes out okay.

We're going to have a quiet Thanksgiving this year, just the four of us. Remember how much fun we used to have on Thanksgiving? We used to help you make the apple pie and the stuffing, and always pick at the stuffing. You made the best Thanksgiving food, Mom.

I started a new job this year. It's really busy. I wish I could talk to you about it. I'm sure you would be proud of me, being a working mom, just like you were. I don't know how you juggled raising the three of us, and working full time. I'm having a hard time, Mom. But don't worry, Wendy is helping me, she's giving me advice.

It was Halloween Friday night. The kids had fun. Dylan dressed as the man with three arms, he had a fake arm in his pocket and his real arm went through the middle of his jacket. Summer was a furry gray mouse, and she was really cute. She loved trick-or-treating this year. Remember we used to hide the candy in the sideboard in our hallway, and secretly start eating the candy out of the bag before Halloween?

I miss you, Mom. I hope you're not too cold out there. I wish I could bring you a nice warm blanket. I love you, Mom.

Love,

Jennifer